December 23, 2013

This insight occurred not long after the “Simple Truth” insight as an expansion of it somehow.  I was with a group of people and I was watching myself and it occurred to me that each person in the room was a character just like my character, and that the only difference was that I was witnessing my character, Pip, from an interior viewpoint.  In other words I was looking through this character’s eyes and seeing the other characters as external while in actuality it was ALL being seen at once. There was the immediate sense that the whole of my present experience, the people, the room, my body, etc,  was like a movie being projected on a screen and I was somehow uninvolved in it.

At the moment I saw this there was a disconnection from my character and I was now looking at a room full of characters, none of which was me and none of whom was more important than any other.  This caused a bit of sadness as I had though this character, Pip, who I took to be myself, was special.  Intellectually I understand the illusion of separation but I am still deeply identified with my character.  And now I saw him as just another character. This was a kind of let-down. Like it ruined the movie and I wanted my money back.  The idea that I am this character and “out there” are other characters, is a judgment but not a reality. From this new perspective life is “just happening.”

This detached perspective continues to arise spontaneously,  as well as whenever I contemplate it. It’s more pronounced, if it occurs to me, when I’m with others. The world appearing as a movie is quite psychedelic when it happens, as if I’m having a lucid dream but not really participating in it. Doesn’t last more than a few seconds.  There is also the vague sense that I am the space in which my experiences are taking place.  While I believe this is the truth, it’s not yet a realization.